Maybe the Packers Can Hire Charles Barkley
Chris Havel from WDUZ The Fan recently had an excellent point about the personnel mismanagement of the Packer’s offensive line. Paraphrasing Havel, he said when Thompson got here he had bookend tackles that were the anchors of the offensive line in Chad Clifton and Mark Tauscher. But neither was a spring rooster anymore, and an astute GM would have recognized that he needed to bring in talent at the guard and center positions before Cliffy and Jesus ran out of medial collateral and anterior cruciate ligaments to give to football.
But Thompson either waited, ignored or was not even cognizant of the status of the guys protecting his quarterback, and the result is what we have right now. Two broken-down bookends at the ends of their careers and a middle that’s as soft as my penis when I look at your mother. (Unless your mom is Heidi Klum. In that case, gimme your number so I can schedule a playdate with you and my kids.)
And so the Packers are left scrambling in mid-season, relegated to using smoke and mirrors to fool opponents, signing guys off the scrap heap, hoping they can contribute for a game or two.
It’s something a good GM would have recognized and addressed. Do you think Bill Belichick would have waited until the front line completely collapsed before he said “Oh, shit. Guess we better do sumthin’ about that.” Of course not.
And so here we sit, several years into Thompson’s tenure, loads of money still sitting in the salary cap coffers to spend, but nobody to spend it on. Some franchises build a team like they’re building a top fuel dragster, all the best components assembled to create something that’ll blow past you right off the line. Ted’s approach has been more like that of a pick-n-pull maven, meandering through the junkyard, wrenches in hand, hoping he can find a gently used piston and maybe some tires with a little tread left to try to put together a Superbowl-worthy powerhouse.
Dudn’t work that way, Ted. And either you’ll need to figure that out quick or Mark Murphy should be looking for someone who can. I hear Charles Barkley is available and want’s a crack at a GM job. Recently on the Dan Patrick radio show he said he knew of lots of general managers who were given their chance and really sucked at the job. Barkley just wants his opportunity to suck, too. Maybe the Packers can give him his shot.