A Pelt Worth Having
Dear Trent Cole, defensive end for the Philadelphia Eagles:
I know you’re a guy who enjoys the hunt. Maybe that’s why you’ve done so well for your team this year, putting 9 quarterback pelts up on your trophy wall so far this year.
Well my friend, there’s a rare animal you have the opportunity to bag on Tuesday night. No license required. Poaching is encouraged.
And when you’re in sight of this prize pelt, let the fever of the hunt take over. Knock it down. Gut it. Wrap yourself in it.
But not in a way that might compromise your manhood, and certainly NOT while wearing a molestery mustache like the guy in the above picture. The guy who is NOT me. No it’s not. Is not.
Ok, it is.
But I mean wrap yourself in the pelt like this:
The pelt? Brett Favre. He wishes all those who face the Packers luck against them. I’m here to offer up the pelt of this tired old animal that just won’t die to anyone that wants it. Please take it. Kill it. Nail it up on your trophy wall.
Though Trent, I’ll be honest. There’s so many cuts and dead spots in that pelt, that when it’s stripped from the carcass, you may only have enough for a nice ladies chapeau.