My Official Green Bay Packers blog

I’m usually a big fan of Jason Whitlock.  But maybe it was only because I saw him in short sound bites.  He was filling in for Jim Rome today, and I wondered if maybe the extra weight he’s packed on somehow weighs on his lungs when he’s in front of a mic for extended periods, robbing his brain of life-giving (reason-fueling) oxygen.  (With his new shaved melon does dude look like Biz Markie, btw?  Maybe it was Jason I saw on Celebrity Fit Club?)  Jason’s take was as follows:  Favre is a diva.  Of course he’s a diva.  He’s an all-pro quarterback in the NFL. It goes with the territory.  He is high maintenance.  But he’s WORTH IT.  So kiss his ass, beg, put a giant brass sculpture at the top of the Lambeau steps ala Rocky Balboa for Favre to gaze on each time he enters.  Do whatever you need to get Brett back.

But Jason, other than the annual Favre Retirement Vigil that began in about ‘05, Favre hasn’t been a head case.  At least not that we knew about.  He didn’t dodge the media (much), didn’t say stupid things in public, didn’t put himself before the team.  So it’s hard for us to lump the ironman of ironmen in with the likes of Terrell Owens, Chad Johnson, Ryan Leaf and Jeff George.  And I heard you say you thought Rodgers, Favre’s replacement, sucked at football.  Based on what?  His 41 minutes of in-game NFL experience?  Either you have inside info we don’t or you were smoking that same pipe you used when you came up with the idea for the NCAA-sponsored youth sports and learning academy to give yet another advantage to those who’ve won the genetic lottery.  Jason, when it comes to sports, you usually got what I need, but today I say you just a friend.

I’m feeling a little guilty. Not for what I said a couple days ago about Favre. That was totally on the mark. I’m feeling guilty for a guy named Bob Dob. You see, he’s selling prints of this Farvely cheesehead painting. And if you take a look through his blog, it appears Bob’s a pretty good guy. And a great painter.

So if you’re a fan (despite all the nasty things I said about #4), stop on over to Thumbtack Press and buy yourself (or a friend) a print. Guaranteed to raise the corners of your mouth.

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Technorati Tags: Bob Dob, Brett Favre, Green Bay Packers, Mickey Eats Brett’s Brains

Attention, all you purveyors of short, numbered sections of hard aluminum benches. I need to sell you on a killer idea. I know, you’re usually accustomed to doing the selling, whether it be tickets to Packer games at Lambeau Field, or for the road warriors (or far-flung fans) who want to see the Pack when they make their appearance at non-Wisconsin NFL venues.

But if you buy my idea, I can guarantee a 30% increase in people looking to buy Green Bay Packers tickets from you.* Everyone wins. Here’s the idea: when you approach me about promoting your company (and you know you will, you check in every year), be sure that the offer you make includes at least one pair of tickets to a Green Bay Packer game. Because you know where the best place is to watch Packer games? It’s not on the crapper with the handheld 3″ LCD, suffering after a night of pickled eggs and chili. It’s Lambeau Field, where you can watch the game live while sitting on assbone-crunching aluminum benches. The seats would really hurt if everyone wasn’t already stone drunk, but since they are (and a few bucks buys will buy you ass-cushion rental), it’s all good. Another perk of seeing a game live? Some of the people there are worth watching. And one other thing? The game’s pretty damn good, too.

I say I’d want at least one pair of tickets because I’d give away the first pair to some lucky reader of this blog. Wha you say? Publicity stunt? Sure. Stupid? Two scoops, please. But like I’ve said before, I’m a giver. The perks of a ticket giveaway: I’d blog about the ticket giveaway (and the great company that provided the tickets), and for the second pair of tickets I’d blog about how much fun I had at the game, watching a new QB lead the team, motorboating the bikini girls (or the fat dude with the C cups two rows down), that kind of stuff.  Stuff That Sells Tickets.

So bake those tickets into your offer and you’ll have yourselves some sweet promotional action. And don’t tell me you don’t have the authority. Who wears the pants over there, anyway?

*Sales increase figure was extracted from ass area and may not be representative of actual sales increase.

Technorati Tags: Green Bay Packers Tickets, Ticket Brokers, Marketing 101